Daniel

These past few days have been pretty rough on me.  Yesterday morning, I kid you not, besides one 30-minute stretch, I didn't go longer than five minutes without getting screamed at by one (or both) of the girls.  At one point, I put them both in their beds in a last-ditch attempt to get them to chill out, and I sat down on the couch with my Bible.

I had last been reading through Daniel, and I opened to the part where the leaders in the land are all getting ticked that Daniel is so beloved.  They watch him, just drooling over an opportunity to bring him down, but Daniel is without fault.  Finally, they get together and have a conference, and the following is what convicted me.  They say to one another, "We shall not find any ground for complaint against this Daniel unless we find it in connection with the law of his God" (Daniel 6:5). 

After these past couple days, undoubtedly the worst in my parental career, it was pretty clear to me that anyone could easily find, uh, quite a few faults with me that were not in connection to the law of God.  And there was probably a pointed lack of faults related to Him.  Sigh.  However, I'm so grateful that there is also the grace of God and that He knows that I really really stink at life sometimes. 

With that said, I'm also so grateful for the strength and patience He has given me.  Although I've messed up A LOT in my parenting, I have been given grace beyond anything that I possess on my own.  Praise the Lord.  So, yes, I've bawled and maybe yelled once or twice, and I've felt impatient and angry, but I've also really loved on my girls, through the whining and tears.  And I've brought my petitions to the Lord.

And this morning, my girls-- so conspicuously absent for the last couple weeks-- were back.  Thank you, also, Jesus, for that!