I remember, back when I was in college, those first days of classes.
You'd walk in, learn about the upcoming semester, get the syllabus and
walk out in a cold sweat because HOW IN THE HECK AM I GOING TO READ AND
DO ALL THIS IN ONE QUARTER?!
I mean, I'm not the only one who dealt with syllabus shock, right? I'm pretty sure it's a thing. Yeah. It's a thing.
So what's the mom version of syllabus shock? Because I think I'm experiencing it right now.
Really,
truly, these last couple weeks have been crazy-pants. And I only have
ONE kid in school! And it's preschool... only three days a week... for
only 2.5 hours a day.
I was trying to process why I've
felt so out of my mind, overwhelmed and just plain flaky. It probably
defies definition, but here's what I think are major contributors:
Riley
started preschool. In the afternoon. I think the afternoon thing has
thrown me for a couple reasons. First, knowing that I have to get Riley
to preschool on time, in the middle of the day, looms over me for the
entire morning. I get super anxious if I'm late, so even though it's
only 8 am, I find myself checking my watch and trying to plan out every
moment up to departure time, so we can be on time. Second, Brooks and
Noelle still nap in the afternoon. This means that I drop Riley off,
throw the other two in bed, let them sleep, then have to wake them up.
Who wants to wake up a peacefully napping kid?! Not me.
I've been
stressed about Brooks. My sweet guy recently was hospitalized overnight
because of wheezing and airway constriction. Then, at his 9-month
check-up (that we went to when he was a little over 10 months... Oops.),
I walked out with orders to FIVE other doctors. Ugh. He will be just
fine, but it was a little much.
The kids are
so close to together but are in different stages. Riley's in
preschool, Noelle would LOVE to be in preschool but is still too young,
and Brooks is still just kind of chilling, taking in the world. Here's a
good example: Riley gets herself into her carseat herself, Noelle can
snap the top clasp, and Brooks still happily gets lugged around a
latched in.
Anyway, I find myself conscious of the fact that I'm not firing
on all cylinders. Yesterday, despite the fact that I had it written
down in two places and had had a conversation about it, I found myself
calling my friend to confirm a playdate because I just didn't trust the
state of my mind or memory. Argh.
Long story short--
I'm clearly a person of routines. And I'm pretty excited for our
routines to get themselves rooted firmly in place.